Midwest Book Review
Are police marriages destined to fail? Will police work challenge the relationship and eventually change a loved one's personality? These are important questions for any considering a relationship with a police officer, and clinical psychologist Kirschman, who's been working with police families for 20 years, is in the perfect position to provide guidance and insights based on case histories.


Review
" ...a moving, thorough, and honest resource for anyone who knows and/or loves a law enforcement officer. Whether you 'belong' to a rookie or veteran officer, Dr. Kirschman's matter-of-fact style of laying out situations, facts, and solutions is sure to provide you with a source of information. Accompanying this abundance of wisdom is an unmistakable sense of compassion and understanding. Utilizing real life examples, clinical knowledge and the depth of understanding that Dr. Kirschman brings to her subject matter, this book provides strategies and coping techniques for almost every situation." --Partners Off Duty Newsletter

"This book presents a masterful expose of the reality of being a police family. The author, in essence, has provided a survival manual for those who choose policing as their life work....This book can be useful in three areas: for police officers and their families, to help them deal with a difficult occupation; for mental health professionals and counselors, to give them an inside view of their police clients; and for researchers, who can benefit from the qualitative information provided in each chapter....This is an important book to read for young people who are contemplating a police career. It should be made a part of criminal justice courses on law enforcement. Police administrators and executives should also read this book, which will give them a better understanding of the line officer's predicament." --Criminal Justice Review

"I highly recommend it to anyone who has a police officer in their families, especially police wives....As a new wife in a police marriage, I found this book to be very supportive and informative....I appreciated the fact that all through the book the author reminds the reader that most problems with a police officer aren't so much due to the job, but due to how the person has been taught to act and cope with stress....This book is also a source of hope when one is faced with problems....it gives common sense answers to the problems we all face....Police work can be both rewarding and harmful to a family. This book gives the tools and resources to balance the two and should be read by both new and seasoned wives!" --www.policewives.com

"Finally, a straight-forward and honest look at issues affecting police officers, their families and social relationships. This book breaks through the stereotypes and reaches a "human" level....This book has something for everyone....Dr. Kirschman has done an exceptional job in providing a manual for anyone connected to law enforcement....It is well written, easy to read and filled with valuable information....Whether you are a police officer, family member, or friend, this book is a "must read." --California Peace Officers Association Newsletter

"A comprehensive, easily understood source of valuable information....Provides such worthwhile information that police administrators should seriously consider making it required reading for promotional examinations." --FBI Magazine

"The book offers a lot of good advice....Kirschman has obviously invested a great deal of time and effort in her research. Her analysis of police work and its effect on the individual officer and family life are right on the mark. In my opinion, the author has achieved her stated goal of offering a practical coping guide for police officers and the people who love them. An excellent resource, most highly recommended." --NJ Cops: New Jersey's Law Enforcement Journal



Emily B. Visher, Ph.D. and John S. Visher, M.D., Cofounders, Stepfamily Association of America
This excellent book, packed with helpful information, and specific examples, is written for police families, and is also invaluable for mental health professionals working with them. Beautifully written and very absorbing to read, this book is focused on the psychological and emotional aspects of police work, and the ways in which these stresses impact family life. On every page Dr. Kirschman demonstrates a sensitive understanding of the men, women, and families involved in a public service career of almost overwhelming difficulty. I love A Cop is a gift of inestimable value to the families themselves, and to the mental health professionals who are attempting to understand and help them


Review
" ...a moving, thorough, and honest resource for anyone who knows and/or loves a law enforcement officer. Whether you 'belong' to a rookie or veteran officer, Dr. Kirschman's matter-of-fact style of laying out situations, facts, and solutions is sure to provide you with a source of information. Accompanying this abundance of wisdom is an unmistakable sense of compassion and understanding. Utilizing real life examples, clinical knowledge and the depth of understanding that Dr. Kirschman brings to her subject matter, this book provides strategies and coping techniques for almost every situation." --Partners Off Duty Newsletter "This book presents a masterful expose of the reality of being a police family. The author, in essence, has provided a survival manual for those who choose policing as their life work....This book can be useful in three areas: for police officers and their families, to help them deal with a difficult occupation; for mental health professionals and counselors, to give them an inside view of their police clients; and for researchers, who can benefit from the qualitative information provided in each chapter....This is an important book to read for young people who are contemplating a police career. It should be made a part of criminal justice courses on law enforcement. Police administrators and executives should also read this book, which will give them a better understanding of the line officer's predicament." --Criminal Justice Review "I highly recommend it to anyone who has a police officer in their families, especially police wives....As a new wife in a police marriage, I found this book to be very supportive and informative....I appreciated the fact that all through the book the author reminds the reader that most problems with a police officer aren't so much due to the job, but due to how the person has been taught to act and cope with stress....This book is also a source of hope when one is faced with problems....it gives common sense answers to the problems we all face....Police work can be both rewarding and harmful to a family.This book breaks through the stereotypes and reaches a "human" level....This book has something for everyone....Dr. Kirschman has done an exceptional job in providing a manual for anyone connected to law enforcement....It is well written, easy to read and filled with valuable information....Whether you are a police officer, family member, or friend, this book is a "must read." --California Peace Officers Association Newsletter "A comprehensive, easily understood source of valuable information....Provides such worthwhile information that police administrators should seriously consider making it required reading for promotional examinations." --FBI Magazine "The book offers a lot of good advice....Kirschman has obviously invested a great deal of time and effort in her research. Her analysis of police work and its effect on the individual officer and family life are right on the mark. In my opinion, the author has achieved her stated goal of offering a practical coping guide for police officers and the people who love them. An excellent resource, most highly recommended." --NJ Cops: New Jersey's Law Enforcement Journal


Book Description
Will police work change the person you love? Are police marriages destined to fail? What are the chances of your loved one being killed in the line of duty? Separating fact from myth, Dr. Ellen Kirschman answers these and other critical questions in the first comprehensive self-help book created specifically for today's police families. In information-filled chapters, readers will go behind the scenes with other police families as they discuss the benefits and pitfalls of police work; learn how to manage the effects of organizational stress and the pressures of unpredictable schedules, long hours and loneliness; gain awareness of the emotional, physical, and behavioral warning signs which can lead to such extreme situations as posttraumatic stress, alcoholism, suicide and domestic violence; find out where families can go for help and counseling; and get an inside look at cop couples and the special challenges facing women, minorities, and gays and lesbians on the force.



About the Author
Dr. Ellen Kirschman, clinical psychologist and consultant, has been working with law enforcement agencies for over 20 years. She has written extensively about the law enforcement culture and is sought after as a speaker and seminar leader. Dr. Kirschman has been an invited guest at the FBI academy and is a member of the Psychology Section of the International Association of Chiefs of Police. She resides in Redwood City, California.



Excerpted from I Love a Cop: What Police Families Need to Know by Ellen Kirschman. Copyright © 1997. Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
I. Hi Honey, I'm Home 1. The Way It Is: Givens and Realities of Policework 2. The Police Officer's Paradox 3. Growing Old in a Young Person's Profession: How Officers Change With Time 4. Organizational Stress: Looking For Love in All the Wrong Places II. Remarkable Events Trauma 5. Critical Incidents, Stress, and Trauma 6. From Victim to Survivor: Working Through Trauma 7. From Battlefront to Homefront: Families and Trauma 8. Kids and Trauma Emotional Extremes 9. Domestic Abuse: The Best Kept Secret Shame of Policing 10. Alcohol Abuse and Suicide Getting Help 11. Getting the Help You Need When You Need It III. Special Families, Special Issues 12. Swimming Upstream: Special Challenges Facing Women, Minorities, Lesbians, and Gay Men in Law Enforcement 13. Cop Couples IV. Summing Up 14. Success Stories

FROM THE PUBLISHER